At my old job, in the booky nook, a lovely man called Tom thought I was a witch.
But not just a general, ordinary, garden-variety witch. Tom thought I was a technology witch. This is because, whenever anything technological broke or went a bit wonky, I was nearly always to blame or, at the very least, in the general vicinity.
Eftpos machines, POS computers, printers, scanners, photocopiers, you name it. If I went near it, it died.
Tom, if you ever read this (or if your dad reads it and passes on this message), nothing’s changed.
Currently, I have a dead website (IT expert HB on the case), dead phone, dying home phone and wonky email.
And, somewhere in Launceston, I bet there are a few computers in their death throes, simply because I looked in their general direction.
Does anybody else have this problem, or only me?
It’s no coincidence that my forthcoming novel, Writing Clementine, features two unusual teenage protagonists who eschew technology in favour of joining a Steampunk Society and behaving as if they’re still living in the industrial age.
I wish I could do this. Most days.
But for now, to paraphrase one of my favourite movies (Romy and Michelle’s High School Reunion – now a “classic”, because am elderly), if anybody needs to make a call, I don’t got a phone. Or anything else that requires plugging in.
Because, it seems, once a witch, always a witch.